Holiday Sweater Round Up: A Prestige Buyer’s Guide

On December 15th, 2015 / By

Holiday Sweater

Holiday Sweater Round Up: A Prestige Buyer’s Guide

Here at Prestige Imports, we recently started a holiday sweater promotion that runs through 31 December 2015. The basics of the deal are simple:

wear your most outlandish holiday sweater when you bring your car in to the service department and enjoy a 20% discount on parts and labor*. To make things even more interesting, we will be taking a photo and loading it to our Facebook page. The customer photo that receives the most Likes, Comments, and Shares will receive a complimentary full vehicle detail** – a $249 Value!

In honor of this limited-time event, I decided to scour the internet for “interesting” holiday sweaters. Below is a list of some choice apparel with bonus commentary by yours truly.

“Hand-Crafted Christmas Cardigan Sweater Ramie and Cotton” ($5)

This wonderful four-paneled, cardigan sweater boasts knitted images of a toy drum and bugle, a teddy bear adorned with a winter’s cap, a Christmas pony, and a tannenbaum. Basically, this is the perfect sweater for those of you who just can’t make a decision and stick with it. I mean, for $5 a person who fits into a woman’s size medium really can have it all.

Holiday Sweater brown_sweater


“Christmas Sweater” ($5)

Don’t let the benign name of this sweater fool you. As one of the few gingerbread (i.e. brown) colored holiday sweaters on Craiglist, you’re sure to show your fellow holiday-enthusiasts that you’re a cut above the rest, so to speak. And with mittens, stockings, and a snowman stitched into the torso area, there’s enough gaudy imagery to offend even the blindest of eyes. And, if I’m not mistaken, it looks as if this might also be a mock turtleneck; what better way to say “I lack all conceivable notions of taste” than to rock a few extra inches of fabric in the neck area.
“Christmas sweater – one of a kind xmas sweater” ($30)

What child doesn’t like to leave a plate of cookies out by the Christmas tree with the hope of seducing a jolly fat man into delivering the choicest of consumer goods? Well, probably billions of kids world-wide that celebrate Ramadan, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, or other non-Christmas-based holidays. But otherwise, yeah, a bunch a American youngsters spend Christmas Eve luring a strange intruder into their homes with sweet treats. It’s kind of like a Crazy Joe Davola maneuver. Bear witness to this weird tradition with this equally weird sweater.

Holiday Sweater Holiday Sweater Holiday Sweater


“Vintage Holiday Sweater” ($50)

Let’s be honest for a second: 85% of those people searching for Christmas/holiday sweaters are hipsters. If we can continue with the trend of honesty, let’s also agree that hipsters will buy, literally, anything at a ridiculous mark-up if the modifier “vintage” is placed in front of it. For example, you couldn’t pay most people to throw down their hard-earned cash for a jalopy; but re-brand it as a “vintage automobile,” and dudes with mustaches, Rivers Cuomo glasses, and skinny jeans will enter into a frenzied bidding war for the clunker. That’s why I absolutely love the marketing tactics used by in this ad. A “vintage” holiday sweater? My guess is that this item will be gone by the time I post this article.

“Broncos Holiday Official Team Sweater sz L” ($30)

OK, call me crazy, but I actually like this sweater quite a bit. The fact that I like this sweater is all the more perplexing due to the fact that I’m a Cleveland Browns’ fan. IDK, there are some things in this zany world that just can’t be explained. If I’m going to attempt an explanation, though, I would wager to guess that the alternating rows of fir trees and donkeys are pleasing to the eye in a primordial, subconscious manner. Oh yeah, the white sleeves make it look like a sweater vest; and, as we all know, sweater vests are the zenith of men’s outerwear fashion.

To schedule a service appointment, call our Parts and Service Department at (833) 825-5423. Don’t forget to wear your holiday sweater when you drop off your vehicle.

Prestige Imports 39.740848, -105.100754.